All In (by Monika Bossart)


Posted on November 22, 2017

Joy. Certainty. Fear. Forgiveness.

Joy for the Kingdom of Heaven, awaiting His spirit.

Certainty for the words spoken: words of truth, not blasphemy.

Fear for the stones, poised to kill.

Forgiveness for the hands that do not know.

 

He fell to his knees shouting, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them!”—his last words, so similar to those of our Saviour, before he “fell asleep” (Acts 7:60).

 

Faith.

What is faith?

Perhaps it is perseverance in the face of the unknown. Perhaps it is the assurance of what is unseen. Perhaps true faith is simply that point of no return. That point of every fibre in your body knowing that Jesus is Lord. No denying it. No going back.

 

The point of no return.

 

Stephen showed faithfulness. He exuded perseverance. But most of all, his spirit was in a place of no return. A place where his life was for the Lord. And only for the Lord. He could not deny the Lord, as every cell in his body knew the truth and could not help but proclaim it. Until the end. In Christ, Stephen lived and moved and had his being.

 

What a beautiful life.

 

Lukewarm

Are you at the point of what some like to call no return? Have you taken up the cross and followed Him? Fully? Laid down your own desires for His? Not in a lukewarm, when-I-feel-like-it way, but in a way that glorifies Him fully?

As these questions and these words spill out of me, I am challenged to reflect on my own life. I ask God to convict me of the lukewarm parts of me. I surrender my spirit to my Lord. I am at the point of no return. There is no going back. I am totally and completely convinced. Broken. Saved. And imperfectly perfect.

I rejoice in God’s grace as I need it over and over again. I fall to my knees and proclaim my life to Him. Fully.

 

I want this.

I was created for this.

What a beautiful thing.

 

Lord, forgive me for the parts of me that are gripping onto my own will. It is so strong sometimes. Help me to trust you, unconditionally. You are my everything.

I am yet again prompted and reminded that, “For in him we live and move and have our being” (Acts 17:28).

Similarly, I am reminded of the song “I Will Follow”, by Chris Tomlin:

 

Where you go, I’ll go

Where you stay, I’ll stay

When you move, I’ll move

I will follow you

Who you love, I’ll love

How you serve I’ll serve

If this life I lose, I will follow you

I will follow you

 

—Monika Bossart

 

A reflection on Acts 6:8–15; 7:51–60

Best When Broken Teaching Series